Exploring Family Trends: Divorce and Cohabitation in Modern Society

    During this week's lessons, we explored family trends, and two topics that particularly stood out to me were divorce and cohabitation. I have witnessed examples of these situations within my extended family, which has made me more curious about the reasons behind them.

    Marriage trends refer to patterns or tendencies in how people approach or enter into marriage over time. These trends are typically influenced by various factors, including cultural, economic, social, and legal changes. Understanding these marriage and family trends can provide valuable insights into how societal values and behaviors evolve. Learning about these trends has helped me gain a better understanding and appreciation for the experiences that my family and friends have gone through and why it's important to recognize these shifts.

    Cohabitation was a significant focus during our lessons on family trends because it has become more common over the years. According to the Census Bureau, by 2020, there were 8.81 million opposite-sex couples living together and more than 469,000 same-sex unmarried couples cohabiting. This data surprised me, but it also highlighted the vast number of people on the planet. It's important to note that this data was collected during 2020 when the COVID-19 pandemic was in full swing. This made me realize that couples, unable to see each other due to strict rules and regulations, decided to move in together to maintain their relationships.

    An example from my extended family regarding cohabitation is that my cousins who have left the church all cohabit with their partners before marriage because it is the social norm for them. One of my oldest cousins, for instance, has two children with his girlfriend, yet they are still not married. I found this interesting because if they are already starting a family with someone they love, why wouldn't they want to get married?

    In Marriage and Family in America by Lauer & Lauer, it is noted that some couples who cohabit will eventually get married when the time feels right for them. Many people cohabit before marriage to test their compatibility and understand each other better, thus aiming to beat the odds of a high divorce rate. However, as we learned in class from Brother Williams, couples who cohabit and then marry later on have a higher chance of divorce in the future. Although the church's stance is against cohabiting with a partner before marriage, if individuals believe it's essential for maintaining a healthy relationship, then it's their decision.

    The second family trend that intrigued me was divorce because it impacts not only the couple but also their children if they have any. I was surprised to learn that divorce rates in America have been on a downward trend, with 42%-45% of first marriages ending in divorce. What is most interesting is that second and third marriages have even higher failure rates, with around 60% of second marriages and 73% of third marriages ending in divorce. Additionally, the average duration of a marriage that ends in divorce is about 13 years, and the average age of couples going through a divorce is 41 years old.

    I've always found divorce to be something sad, especially when it happens to someone close to me. However, it's important to note that, in some instances, divorce can be a positive outcome, particularly in abusive relationships. An example from my experience involves my neighbors, who were high school sweethearts. They got married, but after a few years, they decided to divorce. As we got to know our neighbors better, they shared that sometimes the grass isn't always greener on the other side of the fence. Eventually, they remarried and now have two wonderful children.

    Another experience that stands out to me involves a woman from my home ward who shared her regrets about her divorce. She wished she hadn't filed for divorce because she had three children with her first husband and would always have a connection with him due to the relationship she wanted her kids to have with him. This highlights that sometimes the decisions we make might seem right at the moment but may not be the best choices in the long run.